October is approaching, and with that the colors of fall are beginning to show their faces again. The wind is cooling down, and the apples are at peak yumminess! And I am choosing to savor this time. Yes, I'm choosing to look around and remember the greatness of God, shown to me through the beauty of the changing trees.
Life is crazy. It's stressful, overwhelming, tiring, and, yet, I'm still standing; I'm finding my stride. I read through some of my journal entries from right before college started and they remind me and give me hope and strength to continue even through the toughest days.
I'm still learning a lot about everything. I'm still discovering more about me. and that. is. good.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Consumed
College started this past Monday, a mere 4 days ago. All I can say is this: I'm still standing, I'm still breathing, and I still believe in God.
No, honestly, college is...good...I think. It's very different and right now I still feel like i'm in survival mode, but my parents are my rock through this. Right now, it's their encouragement that gets me through. The first two days of college, actually, the orientation (Wednesday, Thursday and Friday), the weekend, and then, the first two days of college, it was honestly like everything broke inside me...basically, I cried more those days than I have in the past five months. But...I made it. And here I am. And here God is. In the midst...
...And He is calling, asking to be allowed to consume my life to the point that everything I say and do is saturated with his love, his covering, his joy, his strength; Him. And He doesn't want the 10 minutes a day. He wants me to let him into EVERYTHING I do. He wants to come with me when I'm driving. He wants to be the one sitting with me in class. When I start to feel panic rising in my heart during the lecture, He wants me to talk to him about it...right then. He wants to be with me on my run. He wants to consume me. To show me and teach me how to journey deeper, even in this new phase. Not just the "dedicated" time.
Stay Strong...Remaining Strong.
No, honestly, college is...good...I think. It's very different and right now I still feel like i'm in survival mode, but my parents are my rock through this. Right now, it's their encouragement that gets me through. The first two days of college, actually, the orientation (Wednesday, Thursday and Friday), the weekend, and then, the first two days of college, it was honestly like everything broke inside me...basically, I cried more those days than I have in the past five months. But...I made it. And here I am. And here God is. In the midst...
...And He is calling, asking to be allowed to consume my life to the point that everything I say and do is saturated with his love, his covering, his joy, his strength; Him. And He doesn't want the 10 minutes a day. He wants me to let him into EVERYTHING I do. He wants to come with me when I'm driving. He wants to be the one sitting with me in class. When I start to feel panic rising in my heart during the lecture, He wants me to talk to him about it...right then. He wants to be with me on my run. He wants to consume me. To show me and teach me how to journey deeper, even in this new phase. Not just the "dedicated" time.
Stay Strong...Remaining Strong.
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